tonight in a discussion between my boss, Jesse and myself my role as a female was brought up in relation to dating and girls who date a lot and my boss said
"But i'm sure you understand"
Me (casual)- "no not at all i never have and never will be in that situation!"
Boss- "What! well wait until you get to Europe then and you fall in love with a french man/ all the french men"
Me (casual)- "probably but it still wont happen because guys aren't attracted to me."
Boss- "What? why?"
Me (matter of factly)- "Because i'm so masculine."
Boss- "You're not masculine! You're a girly girl!"
GIRLY GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!!!!!!!WQ11111
Me (dumbfounded)- "whatttttt! no i'm so masculine i'm like the most masculine girl ever"
Jesse- "Yeah she really is, apart from me maybe!"
Boss- "Nooo! Berj always says how feminine you are"
Me- "huh?! Is he blind and clearly missing something blatant?"
Boss- "But what about the clothes you wear, and your long hair! they are very girly and feminine"
Me- "uh not really maybe kind of recently, but i'm not talking about that i'm talking about my masculine energy i'm just weird in my interests and it's safe to say that i have the aura of a boy"
The conversation went on like this for a while and i don't think my boss understood that i was talking about my "masculine energy" not my looks and now i think she thinks that i think i'm boyish looking and probably look in the mirror sighing "oh i have such a masculine face"
haha
no
my face is a girl face
but holy crap they think i am a girly girl!!!!! i can't work out if i'm happy or sad at that analogy. i think i'm happy i've never been the girly girl or thought my clothes were feminine
My life is flipping upside down! maybe now i'll pull some hot surfer bAbeSsss
but hopefully not
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Funday
Perfection is hard to come by and perhaps it wouldn't be so nice if it happened because flaws create more love, which is why, ultimately, today was perfect (in a Rachel sense)
Fuck Jess and I had to get up real early, like 8am or some crap, but it was because of a lovely breakfast we were going to which really did turn out to be quite lovely! Banana pancakes are clearly sensational to the tastebuds and i laughed quite a lot with an incredibly broad mix of people. Then we made the journey to dee why in Stu Hutch's car with an unintrusive and flowing blend of The Smiths to compliment the unintrusive and flowing character that is S. Hutchinson. We had so many games of bowling and i started off like some fucking lesbian bowler with a hardcore aim and fluke but i guess luckily that persona of mine was dropped and swapped with jesse but then we both lost it and just became stupid girls who chucked the ball at the pins in the hope of a score more than 0. (not rewarded many times thanks to lack of gutters.) Jackie bought us drinks and paid for our games and it was just such a friendly atmosphere. Once again S. Hutchinson dropped us home, after a stop at McDonalds where he eats a mass load of food! Then we went to work with the prospect of a flawed day but although perhaps slightly flawed the merriment only continued as the free food continued and we got chilli burgers and a casual night + money.
And then i had lots of missed calls and texts on my phone from all the people i love which may seem petty but doesn't everyone like to feel loved by their loved ones? dur
Oh and everything today was absolutely free we didn't pay a single cent for an expensive breakfast, travel to another suburb, drinks and games of bowling, travel back to another suburb, burgers and juice. We got paid for doing cinch work. Fuck yeah! The only mild flaws of getting up early and the prospect of bowling are actually now traits embraced in my mind
Fuck Jess and I had to get up real early, like 8am or some crap, but it was because of a lovely breakfast we were going to which really did turn out to be quite lovely! Banana pancakes are clearly sensational to the tastebuds and i laughed quite a lot with an incredibly broad mix of people. Then we made the journey to dee why in Stu Hutch's car with an unintrusive and flowing blend of The Smiths to compliment the unintrusive and flowing character that is S. Hutchinson. We had so many games of bowling and i started off like some fucking lesbian bowler with a hardcore aim and fluke but i guess luckily that persona of mine was dropped and swapped with jesse but then we both lost it and just became stupid girls who chucked the ball at the pins in the hope of a score more than 0. (not rewarded many times thanks to lack of gutters.) Jackie bought us drinks and paid for our games and it was just such a friendly atmosphere. Once again S. Hutchinson dropped us home, after a stop at McDonalds where he eats a mass load of food! Then we went to work with the prospect of a flawed day but although perhaps slightly flawed the merriment only continued as the free food continued and we got chilli burgers and a casual night + money.
And then i had lots of missed calls and texts on my phone from all the people i love which may seem petty but doesn't everyone like to feel loved by their loved ones? dur
Oh and everything today was absolutely free we didn't pay a single cent for an expensive breakfast, travel to another suburb, drinks and games of bowling, travel back to another suburb, burgers and juice. We got paid for doing cinch work. Fuck yeah! The only mild flaws of getting up early and the prospect of bowling are actually now traits embraced in my mind
Saturday, December 8, 2007
Neverland
Tonight on the train home when we passed milsons point and Jesse exclaimed "woah Luna Park still exists!" Phil said "Rachel, doesn't it feel like you have been seventeen forever."
I thought about it and let it run through my mind and my answer was, "Yeah"
I have been seventeen for so long and then i think nah but then i think yeah remember when you were sixteen and it's all like no actually, i was a totally different person then and that was a lifetime ago so what's going on, how come life is speeding by but i've been a pre-adult for so long. Maybe life is finally throwing me a bone and spoon feeding my obsession with Neverland and youth.
Getting drunk at Luna Park seems such a funny thing to do yet when i turned 17 we had fun, but Jobe was still on pills and we were rapping and Dani and I tried to make our mouths hit the sides of our cheeks and everything was so different but that was only like, 9 months ago.
I can't really figure out what i'm trying to make sense of here, maybe just that being seventeen has been more like 9 years squashed into one (both in the physical sense and shaping of personality)
It just seems like i'll be trapped (or enclosed in a haven?) at this age forever because even when i leave i'll still be seventeen, so really, what's going on here? logic is stupid and you should turn the age successing your current one based on how you feel as a human being, but that would be crap because then i would be like one hundred years old. no no no i am youthful i am youthful
I thought about it and let it run through my mind and my answer was, "Yeah"
I have been seventeen for so long and then i think nah but then i think yeah remember when you were sixteen and it's all like no actually, i was a totally different person then and that was a lifetime ago so what's going on, how come life is speeding by but i've been a pre-adult for so long. Maybe life is finally throwing me a bone and spoon feeding my obsession with Neverland and youth.
Getting drunk at Luna Park seems such a funny thing to do yet when i turned 17 we had fun, but Jobe was still on pills and we were rapping and Dani and I tried to make our mouths hit the sides of our cheeks and everything was so different but that was only like, 9 months ago.
I can't really figure out what i'm trying to make sense of here, maybe just that being seventeen has been more like 9 years squashed into one (both in the physical sense and shaping of personality)
It just seems like i'll be trapped (or enclosed in a haven?) at this age forever because even when i leave i'll still be seventeen, so really, what's going on here? logic is stupid and you should turn the age successing your current one based on how you feel as a human being, but that would be crap because then i would be like one hundred years old. no no no i am youthful i am youthful
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Formal post
15/11/07
Surprisingly, a terrific night!
three amigos!
+ holly!
looking preggers here
outside the minibus!
inside the minibus! (lookin' gross, oh well)
dani!
dani #2!
date (also amigo)
sloping "landscape shot"
amer and damo! long term besty!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
stunned
we had these crazy performers spinning shit and stuff! i wondered aloud "does this turn guys on?"
art class shot (get OUT: charles sapoot..ra(? :S), matthew ho, katie marshall, zoe lassig) ...+ seedy fluros
photos stopped here coz i got drunk and smashed a glass yew
For those of you who made my school days a pleasure may a shining light touch every part of your life, for those who sucked prepare for spells shooting you in the head, (or was that bullets?)
Surprisingly, a terrific night!
three amigos!
+ holly!
looking preggers here
outside the minibus!
inside the minibus! (lookin' gross, oh well)
dani!
dani #2!
date (also amigo)
sloping "landscape shot"
amer and damo! long term besty!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
stunned
we had these crazy performers spinning shit and stuff! i wondered aloud "does this turn guys on?"
art class shot (get OUT: charles sapoot..ra(? :S), matthew ho, katie marshall, zoe lassig) ...+ seedy fluros
photos stopped here coz i got drunk and smashed a glass yew
For those of you who made my school days a pleasure may a shining light touch every part of your life, for those who sucked prepare for spells shooting you in the head, (or was that bullets?)
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
TICK TICK TICK Seventeen Years Nearer My Death
I'M SO BORED WITH THE L. I . F . (E)
Here is an insight of how i dwindle away my days!
Making gay (but cute...) hens chase bread to gobble up :) notice my "hehe"s
-
Searching for Lucy (aka Lucifer) ((a usually mute cat))
-
Easily finding Monty (lazy oaf, usually a loud cat)
NB this is not my normal voice i can't help it when i'm around pets i became sickly mushy Rachel 4 octaves higher. Don't know why but i'm quite cute and usually more masculine
Here is an insight of how i dwindle away my days!
Making gay (but cute...) hens chase bread to gobble up :) notice my "hehe"s
-
Searching for Lucy (aka Lucifer) ((a usually mute cat))
-
Easily finding Monty (lazy oaf, usually a loud cat)
NB this is not my normal voice i can't help it when i'm around pets i became sickly mushy Rachel 4 octaves higher. Don't know why but i'm quite cute and usually more masculine
Saturday, November 17, 2007
I Seek Sadness
This is my problem
A discontentment with what's happening in 'reality' can only lead to (courtesy of an active mind) a leaning towards the imagination. Of course, there are bound to be stages of 'life' where discontent and a search for convalescence is slightly more pressing than usual. So it seems that perhaps the fine line between fantasy and reality is blurred, a dangerous aspect as my dreamscapes are constructed and elaborate on miniscule details of my life that crave elaboration... so sometimes i have to stop and really question did that happen or was that a fleeting moment in my mind, a figment of my imagination?
The answer is always the latter, nothing in my life reflects the fairytale animation i want therefore the result is always crushing
I can't help wanting these ideals and i sure can't do anything about nobody else wanting them --> I can't wait forever, the only one looking at life through a silver mist of idealism. Nothing will ever happen except for disappointment
It's like hunting for Hallows. I'll never get 'em all, not when it counts
A discontentment with what's happening in 'reality' can only lead to (courtesy of an active mind) a leaning towards the imagination. Of course, there are bound to be stages of 'life' where discontent and a search for convalescence is slightly more pressing than usual. So it seems that perhaps the fine line between fantasy and reality is blurred, a dangerous aspect as my dreamscapes are constructed and elaborate on miniscule details of my life that crave elaboration... so sometimes i have to stop and really question did that happen or was that a fleeting moment in my mind, a figment of my imagination?
The answer is always the latter, nothing in my life reflects the fairytale animation i want therefore the result is always crushing
I can't help wanting these ideals and i sure can't do anything about nobody else wanting them --> I can't wait forever, the only one looking at life through a silver mist of idealism. Nothing will ever happen except for disappointment
It's like hunting for Hallows. I'll never get 'em all, not when it counts
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
You Can Almost Smell The Flowers!!!
Ball Dress!
Today!
Reminiscent of a rose garden or some sort of flower garden
i like it
I still really like my old dress so i think i will just wear it to Scott's the next week. although Jobe suggested i should wear jeans and a turtleneck sweater. hairy legs, shaved head. Hahaha oh dear
I had a really pleasant day, just Danielle and myself. I chose her dress and she chose mine, we gonna be da prettiest gurls at da ball. I hope i don't look TOO sexy i've got to keep Mr. Gardiner away from me ahahah grosss i feel so germy after putting that thought onto e-paper, infact the fact that it even popped into my head is beyond repulsive i don't think i've ever looked sexy in my life :)
Today!
Reminiscent of a rose garden or some sort of flower garden
i like it
I still really like my old dress so i think i will just wear it to Scott's the next week. although Jobe suggested i should wear jeans and a turtleneck sweater. hairy legs, shaved head. Hahaha oh dear
I had a really pleasant day, just Danielle and myself. I chose her dress and she chose mine, we gonna be da prettiest gurls at da ball. I hope i don't look TOO sexy i've got to keep Mr. Gardiner away from me ahahah grosss i feel so germy after putting that thought onto e-paper, infact the fact that it even popped into my head is beyond repulsive i don't think i've ever looked sexy in my life :)
Sunday, November 11, 2007
FOREVER
Something that stuck in my head today was a short exchange of words on the way home from NOTOWN. NEWTOWN SUCKS. NEWTOWN MAKES ME FROWN it takes the crown for worst town. what's with this ghey mood probably some newtown fag aimed some drugs at my open mouth and scored
Anyway, Phil asked me if i hated him. And then went on to reason all the reasons why I would hate him according to my personality (ie he's loud, he finds his own jokes really funny) and i said no you stupid idiot you're second in my top friends ahaha but it seems like you hate yourself
and he said so i guess that makes me your second best friend
Anyway, Phil asked me if i hated him. And then went on to reason all the reasons why I would hate him according to my personality (ie he's loud, he finds his own jokes really funny) and i said no you stupid idiot you're second in my top friends ahaha but it seems like you hate yourself
and he said so i guess that makes me your second best friend
Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now
Today was one of those days where you lose all faith in your better judgement. you know, i was contemplating not actually going to the Newtown, i mean newtown (don't deserve no capital) festival, just because.. well, just because i felt like moping around home and irritating my little brother and just being a general nuisance!
i got up really early and drove 15 minutes away (i could have made a 1 minute walk) to buy biscuits for my cats because they didn't like what they had for breakfast and face it they are royalty in my opinion. so i drove to get them cat biscuits, and i got two bags because they were on special. then i decided i felt like a coffee but instead i got a frappuccino because it was really hot and drank it upstairs by myself, early in the morning, slurping away and watching a university student who was breathing heavily over a chemistry textbook with very stressed out skin. i enjoyed myself thoroughly!
and the newfrown festy later in the day only further implemented my belief that i hate huge crowds and scene kids in their huge groups and gothic kids in their huge troops unless i have a cool beverage or soothing company to help me hurl insults or a leafy location to provide shelter from death sun. we sat to watch paper scissors fo a bit and i ate... ahh fuck it i can't remember the name i had it last time, pancakey stuff, moved, and moved. lost george, lost dani numerous times. reunited with tom and the lot. exchanged phone call/s with jobe, found jobe, shared complaints with jobe, met others, charline grace ate sushi, j. sam me went to find takeaway. apparently horrible rice pudding, possibly bad potatoes, girls with nice mouths...? engaged in a manly conversation i remember this arising. left them, really should have accepted a lift because i spent so long trying to find phil afterwards and it was basically an impossible feat with 0 credit on the cellular, LUCKILY i heard "rachel!" and i found pete and matt and stuff loitering around a spiky tree.
think i escaped and was home by 6.30ish
went out to dinner with the fam at "thai in a flash" or "super quick thai" or "speedy thai" or something. it was just greasy. i never really thought thai could be greasy but it was, but i bumped into Anna who i hadn't seen in about 9 months which was nice.
so basically, my 'better judgement' at the start of the day was something along the lines of "go on Rachel, you'll regret it"
nup! a day of petty annoyance would have been wonderful, bigmouth strikes again
i got up really early and drove 15 minutes away (i could have made a 1 minute walk) to buy biscuits for my cats because they didn't like what they had for breakfast and face it they are royalty in my opinion. so i drove to get them cat biscuits, and i got two bags because they were on special. then i decided i felt like a coffee but instead i got a frappuccino because it was really hot and drank it upstairs by myself, early in the morning, slurping away and watching a university student who was breathing heavily over a chemistry textbook with very stressed out skin. i enjoyed myself thoroughly!
and the newfrown festy later in the day only further implemented my belief that i hate huge crowds and scene kids in their huge groups and gothic kids in their huge troops unless i have a cool beverage or soothing company to help me hurl insults or a leafy location to provide shelter from death sun. we sat to watch paper scissors fo a bit and i ate... ahh fuck it i can't remember the name i had it last time, pancakey stuff, moved, and moved. lost george, lost dani numerous times. reunited with tom and the lot. exchanged phone call/s with jobe, found jobe, shared complaints with jobe, met others, charline grace ate sushi, j. sam me went to find takeaway. apparently horrible rice pudding, possibly bad potatoes, girls with nice mouths...? engaged in a manly conversation i remember this arising. left them, really should have accepted a lift because i spent so long trying to find phil afterwards and it was basically an impossible feat with 0 credit on the cellular, LUCKILY i heard "rachel!" and i found pete and matt and stuff loitering around a spiky tree.
think i escaped and was home by 6.30ish
went out to dinner with the fam at "thai in a flash" or "super quick thai" or "speedy thai" or something. it was just greasy. i never really thought thai could be greasy but it was, but i bumped into Anna who i hadn't seen in about 9 months which was nice.
so basically, my 'better judgement' at the start of the day was something along the lines of "go on Rachel, you'll regret it"
nup! a day of petty annoyance would have been wonderful, bigmouth strikes again
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
The Adventures of Rachel and Son in The Nighttime
Last night was so strange! and it all happened in the vicinity of my own home
Everything was great, i was thinking how it's a pity i manage to find amazing personalities but always females, and what a shame it is that i don't have a single lesbian bone in my body because then i'd be set for life, partner-wise. Then i got thinking, i wonder if any of the neighbours can see me, dancing in flowing movements all over my kitchen singing 'love, love will tear us apart,' a gourmet sandwich in one hand and a cat in the other, meowing along with me. Oh it was a wonderful sight, but i'm sure not so wonderful for prying eyes so i hope for their sake and for mine actually, no one saw. Haha i'm so gross i should be shot right off this planet, and a shame i don't have lesbian bones? i think not, heterosexual bones will do me just fine.
Anyway, so it was quite a normal night, about 11pm, a nice sandwich and some juice and i went downstairs to watch some teevee. Then it got saddd. The cat that was once in my hand had disappeared outside and returned to the door (very proudly) with a dead baby rat in his mouth. I'm always sad when that happens because Monty thinks he's done something great (but let me tell you he is no killer, he's so wonderfully thick and slow that he finds dead things on the ground and THINKS he caught them.) I let him in "Montyyyyy nooo i don't like your presents!" but then shockhorror it is not dead it is alive and doing this horrible coughing. Shockhorror, it is not a rat it is a tiny baby possum with blood on his/her (i think his) ears. I was soo sad and didn't no what to do and was crying because there was this poor little animal dying on my floor and coughing this horrible cough and shivering. Cursing my cat i shut him upstairs and got a blanket and gently rubbed him dry with a towel and put him in a roomy cotton sock on top of a covered hot water bottle to warm the little soul up. It was horrible he was coughing and he kept hugging my hand and looking for a nipple to suck or something but i couldn't let him go there plus there's no damn milk there anyway. So i quickly did some research and damnit he couldn't have cows milk and that's the only milk i had. So i made some 'rehydrating' substance and gave him some but he didn't really like it.
I kept him on my lap until about 2 in the morning and he felt nice and warm and i could hear wild calls outside so i thought (stupidly) i bet his Mom's looking for him. i got a fresh hot water bottle and lots of towelling and found him a sheltered spot under some bushes in the garden and left him there.
I dreamt that i awoke to my dad saying "he made it all right! Look at the size of him!" and he had turned into a dinosaur with a little possum head. Nah, didn't happen in real life eh. I finally went to check on him the next morning. I don't know why i delayed it i guess i just thought he'd either have gone with his Mom or be dead. I found him and to my horror he was soaked through and still breathing but coughing and on the verge of death i'm sure. I have never felt as horrible as i felt when i discovered him like that. You may notice i refer to the possum as 'him.' I didn't want to name him it was too sad if he died
I rushed to get a new hot water bottle and put him in fresh towels in my room in a shoebox and he was coughing but he slept for a long time. Mum came home and said "where's the possum?" and I was like "how did you know!" and then she reminded me that i had come into their bedroom the previous night and had stood there like a lonely sobbing ghost until Mum opened her eyes and i pitifully asked what to do with the dying possum on our floor. Haha i'm so gay. So mum called this animal rescue place and they said to keep him warm (smuggly i said "done that!")
They finally came to pick him up at 4pm today, 15 hours after he was brought into my life! I'm really going to miss him, i picked the lice off his baby coat and fed him hydrating substances and he scurried up my arms and nestled in the folds of my jumper. I named him Otis
Everything was great, i was thinking how it's a pity i manage to find amazing personalities but always females, and what a shame it is that i don't have a single lesbian bone in my body because then i'd be set for life, partner-wise. Then i got thinking, i wonder if any of the neighbours can see me, dancing in flowing movements all over my kitchen singing 'love, love will tear us apart,' a gourmet sandwich in one hand and a cat in the other, meowing along with me. Oh it was a wonderful sight, but i'm sure not so wonderful for prying eyes so i hope for their sake and for mine actually, no one saw. Haha i'm so gross i should be shot right off this planet, and a shame i don't have lesbian bones? i think not, heterosexual bones will do me just fine.
Anyway, so it was quite a normal night, about 11pm, a nice sandwich and some juice and i went downstairs to watch some teevee. Then it got saddd. The cat that was once in my hand had disappeared outside and returned to the door (very proudly) with a dead baby rat in his mouth. I'm always sad when that happens because Monty thinks he's done something great (but let me tell you he is no killer, he's so wonderfully thick and slow that he finds dead things on the ground and THINKS he caught them.) I let him in "Montyyyyy nooo i don't like your presents!" but then shockhorror it is not dead it is alive and doing this horrible coughing. Shockhorror, it is not a rat it is a tiny baby possum with blood on his/her (i think his) ears. I was soo sad and didn't no what to do and was crying because there was this poor little animal dying on my floor and coughing this horrible cough and shivering. Cursing my cat i shut him upstairs and got a blanket and gently rubbed him dry with a towel and put him in a roomy cotton sock on top of a covered hot water bottle to warm the little soul up. It was horrible he was coughing and he kept hugging my hand and looking for a nipple to suck or something but i couldn't let him go there plus there's no damn milk there anyway. So i quickly did some research and damnit he couldn't have cows milk and that's the only milk i had. So i made some 'rehydrating' substance and gave him some but he didn't really like it.
I kept him on my lap until about 2 in the morning and he felt nice and warm and i could hear wild calls outside so i thought (stupidly) i bet his Mom's looking for him. i got a fresh hot water bottle and lots of towelling and found him a sheltered spot under some bushes in the garden and left him there.
I dreamt that i awoke to my dad saying "he made it all right! Look at the size of him!" and he had turned into a dinosaur with a little possum head. Nah, didn't happen in real life eh. I finally went to check on him the next morning. I don't know why i delayed it i guess i just thought he'd either have gone with his Mom or be dead. I found him and to my horror he was soaked through and still breathing but coughing and on the verge of death i'm sure. I have never felt as horrible as i felt when i discovered him like that. You may notice i refer to the possum as 'him.' I didn't want to name him it was too sad if he died
I rushed to get a new hot water bottle and put him in fresh towels in my room in a shoebox and he was coughing but he slept for a long time. Mum came home and said "where's the possum?" and I was like "how did you know!" and then she reminded me that i had come into their bedroom the previous night and had stood there like a lonely sobbing ghost until Mum opened her eyes and i pitifully asked what to do with the dying possum on our floor. Haha i'm so gay. So mum called this animal rescue place and they said to keep him warm (smuggly i said "done that!")
They finally came to pick him up at 4pm today, 15 hours after he was brought into my life! I'm really going to miss him, i picked the lice off his baby coat and fed him hydrating substances and he scurried up my arms and nestled in the folds of my jumper. I named him Otis
dead flowers
awwww my god there is officially no way jesse is coming around europe with me anymore. uni commitments
fuck!
i have to find someone quick
or do i go by myself?
i definitely want 'alone time' - a few weeks or so. but 12 months i don't know if i can survive by myself for that long without another soul of similar origin (and by that i mean language)..
oh dear. if someone is reading this and you're free next year from around march and want to have some of the best times of your life with an ace chick (me) write me! seriously! i'm real nice and sometimes i make jokes it will be fun xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
fuck!
i have to find someone quick
or do i go by myself?
i definitely want 'alone time' - a few weeks or so. but 12 months i don't know if i can survive by myself for that long without another soul of similar origin (and by that i mean language)..
oh dear. if someone is reading this and you're free next year from around march and want to have some of the best times of your life with an ace chick (me) write me! seriously! i'm real nice and sometimes i make jokes it will be fun xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
PANIC on the streets of my throat
errrrrrrrr i'm never sick for more than a day and i've been sick for a whole 4 days now. the only good part of having a cold is sneezing heaps and having a sexxxy voice but today those things subsided into 0 sneezes and an ugly, ugly voice. i feel like a mutt
HSC IS OVER ON FRIDAY YEW!
not
i've actually had fun, it's been quite relaxing ahaha i'm going to do SO well
i mentioned that i was going to write a book! well i am, i'm starting it during the heavy cloud of grey of DOOOOOm that is hanging over my head- schoolies of course! everyone will be drinking doin' sum pillz going to da club and i'll be sipping some cask wine and writing my book in whatever nature i can find north of brisvegas yeaaah! oh my this makes that awful week so much more appealing
I had a bath last night!!!! a nice warm bath with scented candles and Enya haha NOT THAT I CAN SMELL IT WITH THIS STUFFY NOSE. :( :( :( grrrrAAAAAACHARLINE
woo books
Sunday, November 4, 2007
XXSEX > XXGAY
"You know when your in love
when you can't fall asleep
because reality is finally
better than your
dreams"
pffft! this is the gayest citation i've ever heard in my life! not only is it completely gay, it's just plain wrong. number one, you can't not fall asleep because that's just going against the rules of the human configuration and you'd die, number two DREAMS WILL ALWAYS TOWER OVER REALITY
if you could see me i'd be spluttering all over my cereal i'm so utterly disgusted
i'm writing a book!
when you can't fall asleep
because reality is finally
better than your
dreams"
pffft! this is the gayest citation i've ever heard in my life! not only is it completely gay, it's just plain wrong. number one, you can't not fall asleep because that's just going against the rules of the human configuration and you'd die, number two DREAMS WILL ALWAYS TOWER OVER REALITY
if you could see me i'd be spluttering all over my cereal i'm so utterly disgusted
i'm writing a book!
Friday, November 2, 2007
Before Halloween, Halloween, After Halloween
I'm really sick and really mind numb and really avoiding study so let me think what i've been doing this past week
Tuesday- BIOLOGY! haha what a dismal, dismal attempt at an exam. sucked
Phil and i got some pizza afterwards and looked in some opshops. didn't find a single find. that night we got icecream and broke into dani's new house and it was realll scary. there was no furniture, and i had been absolutely busting for the toilet and once i'd done that i knew immediately that those fags were trying to scare me (i scare V. easily). all the lights were off and i was standing in this room alone in the dark and i just started wailing like a lost cat for about a minute or two until they realised how unkind they were being to me because being lost in a foreign house with no furniture and no lights and in the bush with hermits probably scrabbling at the doors is basically my worst nightmare. we looked around but then we all got really scared because we could feel a strangers prescence upstairs and the loft was open so we bolted really quickly home
Wednesday- halloweeeeeen! jobe, charl, ash and i went trick o' treatin' around the richer area of manly. we actually got a decent hoard, probably because we went too late and everyone just gave us their leftovers. jobe's technique included buzzing everyone in the apartment block at the same time, resulting in the residents crying out "who is it?!" and us replying "teeeeeeeenagers!!!!" i somehow lost the bottom of my shoe and didn't realise until later when i was walking unevenly. charline charmed a whole bag of halloween snakes out of one lady and her little boy, we got startled by a garage that opened up and revealed a big gorilla growling at us, we could see the lady who wouldn't answer her door in the reflection of her hallway mirror. sucker!
hunger pangs meant we went to get pizza and chips with lots of sauce. we were approached by an irish man who said he wanted to get dressed up as a leprechaun (complete with authentic irish accent) but he said we were the only people he'd seen dressed up. hahaha it's kind of funny because we were barely dressed up apart from some fangs painted on and some scars, but people are all like "ooh i love your costume". especially to jobe. "but i'm not dressed up!" hahaha. the best moment of the night was probably when a girl was being discussed and how she'd lost heaps of weight and charline said "yeah she used to look like vomit but now she just looks like poo." naturally we are all flabbergasted and laughing and jobe says
"but poo is worse then vomit.." and charline replies
"No! poo is all the same.. but see vomit well it varies.."
haha!
oh and we uncovered a little gay boy in one house
Thursday- i went in the morning with mum to get passport photos because i am getting a british passport yay! and becoming a british citizen yay! but we couldn't get it because only a couple of places in sydney do it. so i met up with phil and elle and we got a beverage and went to brookvale opshop. it was ok, i got some really nice shoes but ahhh as soon as i got home the heel of it crumbled! SO annoying
Tuesday- BIOLOGY! haha what a dismal, dismal attempt at an exam. sucked
Phil and i got some pizza afterwards and looked in some opshops. didn't find a single find. that night we got icecream and broke into dani's new house and it was realll scary. there was no furniture, and i had been absolutely busting for the toilet and once i'd done that i knew immediately that those fags were trying to scare me (i scare V. easily). all the lights were off and i was standing in this room alone in the dark and i just started wailing like a lost cat for about a minute or two until they realised how unkind they were being to me because being lost in a foreign house with no furniture and no lights and in the bush with hermits probably scrabbling at the doors is basically my worst nightmare. we looked around but then we all got really scared because we could feel a strangers prescence upstairs and the loft was open so we bolted really quickly home
Wednesday- halloweeeeeen! jobe, charl, ash and i went trick o' treatin' around the richer area of manly. we actually got a decent hoard, probably because we went too late and everyone just gave us their leftovers. jobe's technique included buzzing everyone in the apartment block at the same time, resulting in the residents crying out "who is it?!" and us replying "teeeeeeeenagers!!!!" i somehow lost the bottom of my shoe and didn't realise until later when i was walking unevenly. charline charmed a whole bag of halloween snakes out of one lady and her little boy, we got startled by a garage that opened up and revealed a big gorilla growling at us, we could see the lady who wouldn't answer her door in the reflection of her hallway mirror. sucker!
hunger pangs meant we went to get pizza and chips with lots of sauce. we were approached by an irish man who said he wanted to get dressed up as a leprechaun (complete with authentic irish accent) but he said we were the only people he'd seen dressed up. hahaha it's kind of funny because we were barely dressed up apart from some fangs painted on and some scars, but people are all like "ooh i love your costume". especially to jobe. "but i'm not dressed up!" hahaha. the best moment of the night was probably when a girl was being discussed and how she'd lost heaps of weight and charline said "yeah she used to look like vomit but now she just looks like poo." naturally we are all flabbergasted and laughing and jobe says
"but poo is worse then vomit.." and charline replies
"No! poo is all the same.. but see vomit well it varies.."
haha!
oh and we uncovered a little gay boy in one house
Thursday- i went in the morning with mum to get passport photos because i am getting a british passport yay! and becoming a british citizen yay! but we couldn't get it because only a couple of places in sydney do it. so i met up with phil and elle and we got a beverage and went to brookvale opshop. it was ok, i got some really nice shoes but ahhh as soon as i got home the heel of it crumbled! SO annoying
Sunday, October 28, 2007
"Well Flies Are Attracted To Garbage"
feet are hurtin' reallllll good. slash bad
Daylight saving annoys me it feels like i've lost an hour of my life and i had like zero time to get ready this morning because although jobe had courteously informed me last night that "12.30 is actually 11.30" i still forgot to put my mobile forward therefore i thought it was 10.45 but it was actually 11.45 so yeah. makes you think doesn't it
I ended up meeting Charline and Jobe at wynyard at around 1pm and we went to raben which is actually..."raren" now? who knows, there were actually heaps of lovely shoes and a really awesome pair that jobe and i have been searching for for at least a year but because of lack of funds, they weren't bought. it was noted that cute shoes are always less cute in normal human sizes
By now Charline and i were both complaining about walking haha i just have feet covered in blisters and it hurtsss but still we walked to crown st and had a look around. i found the nicest dress but the bottom of it was too clingy but the top bit was soooo amazing and i really want it :(
no one was really in the mood for shopping so we got sushi, or rather, the girls got sushi but the boy drank juice and ate crackers and cheese. they didn't really have anything i liked at this sushi train, the majority of the dishes were chicken based. eww i read this article after my meal about this chimp/ape/gorilla who got shaved every second day and men paid to have sex with her, so sad, and furthermore, what the crap is wrong with those men?
yew we were all tired by then so hopped on a bus, jobe got McD's, we watched as charline had the best facial expressions whilst reading that article aha. we watched this busker i can't remember his name now annoyingly i'm pretty sure it was 'sky' and he was all cutely dressed in a 3 piece suit and bow tie and he played my heart will go on on violin! it was so nice we actually gave him money and talked about booking him for the formal, although he'd probably have to play some rave music haha gross
Daylight saving annoys me it feels like i've lost an hour of my life and i had like zero time to get ready this morning because although jobe had courteously informed me last night that "12.30 is actually 11.30" i still forgot to put my mobile forward therefore i thought it was 10.45 but it was actually 11.45 so yeah. makes you think doesn't it
I ended up meeting Charline and Jobe at wynyard at around 1pm and we went to raben which is actually..."raren" now? who knows, there were actually heaps of lovely shoes and a really awesome pair that jobe and i have been searching for for at least a year but because of lack of funds, they weren't bought. it was noted that cute shoes are always less cute in normal human sizes
By now Charline and i were both complaining about walking haha i just have feet covered in blisters and it hurtsss but still we walked to crown st and had a look around. i found the nicest dress but the bottom of it was too clingy but the top bit was soooo amazing and i really want it :(
no one was really in the mood for shopping so we got sushi, or rather, the girls got sushi but the boy drank juice and ate crackers and cheese. they didn't really have anything i liked at this sushi train, the majority of the dishes were chicken based. eww i read this article after my meal about this chimp/ape/gorilla who got shaved every second day and men paid to have sex with her, so sad, and furthermore, what the crap is wrong with those men?
yew we were all tired by then so hopped on a bus, jobe got McD's, we watched as charline had the best facial expressions whilst reading that article aha. we watched this busker i can't remember his name now annoyingly i'm pretty sure it was 'sky' and he was all cutely dressed in a 3 piece suit and bow tie and he played my heart will go on on violin! it was so nice we actually gave him money and talked about booking him for the formal, although he'd probably have to play some rave music haha gross
Friday, October 26, 2007
IMAGINARY DOORMATS!
awww yesterday phil and i were just walking along oxford st, our day already dampened by the unwelcomed heat and my raging sore feet, but then we noticed a bus go past and everyone on it was looking at us and then one started waving and then others started waving and then phil goes IT'S OUR SCHOOL! hahaha omg it was the year nines haha it was so cute so we waved back, our school clearly misses us now we gone
we met the cutest puppy called Amos in somedays he was exactly like his owner they had the same colour hair and curls and the dog was just oh so rolley poley, tumbling all over the place
um yeah so my blisters got so bad and they hurt so bad that we just had to stop and eat a burger and juice and decide that we will actually live in surry hills, just closer to crown st. and stuff in a cheap street. it made me so happy when a man walked past and then stopped and scuffed his shoes on the pavement as if there was an imaginary doormat aha so happy :)
gross heaps later that night when i was walking home and it was as dark as a night sky can manage i was walking up this hill and i saw a glint and i new straight away that it was a spiders web and i could even make out the spider himself but for some reason i decided to just let happen what was gonna happen but the moment that spiders web touched my lips i went madman crazy, whipping my hands over my face thousands of times and doing that superficial spitting/wiping of the tongue thing over and over. and then i happened again like 30 seconds later! now, i'm definitely not a spider hater but when you get a web and possible spider + baby spiders to the face i'm not a fan
we met the cutest puppy called Amos in somedays he was exactly like his owner they had the same colour hair and curls and the dog was just oh so rolley poley, tumbling all over the place
um yeah so my blisters got so bad and they hurt so bad that we just had to stop and eat a burger and juice and decide that we will actually live in surry hills, just closer to crown st. and stuff in a cheap street. it made me so happy when a man walked past and then stopped and scuffed his shoes on the pavement as if there was an imaginary doormat aha so happy :)
gross heaps later that night when i was walking home and it was as dark as a night sky can manage i was walking up this hill and i saw a glint and i new straight away that it was a spiders web and i could even make out the spider himself but for some reason i decided to just let happen what was gonna happen but the moment that spiders web touched my lips i went madman crazy, whipping my hands over my face thousands of times and doing that superficial spitting/wiping of the tongue thing over and over. and then i happened again like 30 seconds later! now, i'm definitely not a spider hater but when you get a web and possible spider + baby spiders to the face i'm not a fan
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Mandarin Erotica
You know sometimes you have a moment and you're thinking this is a bit weird, but you don't act on your suspicions because you think you're most probably thinking too much into it? i ALWAYS do this, and i had one of those moments with my (male) boss today, i'm not sure what to make of it
we were eating mandarins. here's the scenario:
me: gross i hate mandarins they're nothing like oranges
boss: and he said oh really, what turns you off?
me: umm.. you mean in mandarins..?
boss: yes in mandarins
me: i just don't really like them that's all
boss: do you like them firm? i like it when they're nice and firm
luckily then i had a customer and was like um sorry to end this awful conversation but i'm going to a place where mandarins aren't erotic, or so i was thinking in my head
this was one of those moments, wasn't it? i think way too suspiciously, it could be potentially self destructive
we were eating mandarins. here's the scenario:
me: gross i hate mandarins they're nothing like oranges
boss: and he said oh really, what turns you off?
me: umm.. you mean in mandarins..?
boss: yes in mandarins
me: i just don't really like them that's all
boss: do you like them firm? i like it when they're nice and firm
luckily then i had a customer and was like um sorry to end this awful conversation but i'm going to a place where mandarins aren't erotic, or so i was thinking in my head
this was one of those moments, wasn't it? i think way too suspiciously, it could be potentially self destructive
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
MER MER MER MER MER MER MER MER.
i got an email from my (lovely) modern history teacher
"Hi Rachel
Just wanted to wish you all the very best for thursday. I am sure that you are very well prepared. I am confident that you will do well.
See you thursday. Best wishes!"
mer! oh geez isn't that a huge burden of guilt right over my head. i'm not well prepared i just hate it there's too much to know. i know albert speer and i know nazi germany because they are interesting but WWI and conflict in europe oh gawd that will be a sore sight for any markers eyes. hang on, sometimes i can ace WWI, but otherwise i'm doomed.
when did i become like this? when did my intellect slip? i think it definitely begun this year. oh well no big deal i'm enrolling in the national art school anyway and that's non UAI! and i can major in photography yayyyy (L)
on the subject of photography, one day soon i'm going to make a link or something, and share some of mine. maybe that's when my intellect slipped? because phil and i spent most of our senior highschool life in the darkroom rather than .. knuckling down. haha oh i miss school i remember when we were in year eleven and we were real bored one free period so we made an awesome cubby house out of huge canvas boards and material we found in the artroom and we stuck a sign on it imitating our lovely art teachers prose. "YEAR 12 MAJOR WORK, PLEASE DON'T TOUCH! THANKS, MOE :)" hahaha and we stayed in there all lunchtime and ate mixed nuts and peeked at all the people in the artroom who were like 'who did that for their majorwork? it's pretty weird' haha oh my school was great. and moe got really angry at us. wait, not us, just me that stupid bitch!
yes. yes, this is definitely how my intellect slipped
"Hi Rachel
Just wanted to wish you all the very best for thursday. I am sure that you are very well prepared. I am confident that you will do well.
See you thursday. Best wishes!"
mer! oh geez isn't that a huge burden of guilt right over my head. i'm not well prepared i just hate it there's too much to know. i know albert speer and i know nazi germany because they are interesting but WWI and conflict in europe oh gawd that will be a sore sight for any markers eyes. hang on, sometimes i can ace WWI, but otherwise i'm doomed.
when did i become like this? when did my intellect slip? i think it definitely begun this year. oh well no big deal i'm enrolling in the national art school anyway and that's non UAI! and i can major in photography yayyyy (L)
on the subject of photography, one day soon i'm going to make a link or something, and share some of mine. maybe that's when my intellect slipped? because phil and i spent most of our senior highschool life in the darkroom rather than .. knuckling down. haha oh i miss school i remember when we were in year eleven and we were real bored one free period so we made an awesome cubby house out of huge canvas boards and material we found in the artroom and we stuck a sign on it imitating our lovely art teachers prose. "YEAR 12 MAJOR WORK, PLEASE DON'T TOUCH! THANKS, MOE :)" hahaha and we stayed in there all lunchtime and ate mixed nuts and peeked at all the people in the artroom who were like 'who did that for their majorwork? it's pretty weird' haha oh my school was great. and moe got really angry at us. wait, not us, just me that stupid bitch!
yes. yes, this is definitely how my intellect slipped
Monday, October 22, 2007
O/S O/S O/S O/S O/S O/S O/S O/S
i feel really weird my nanna just called from england raving about how she's found all this accommodation for me in norway for next year
firstly, although i'm so appreciative i don't want to go with the burden of having to turn up in a certain place at a certain time
and secondly, how the heck am i going to manage being away from all my lovelies for a year?!?!? i'll get back and everyone will have changed but i wont have or i'll think everyone's changed but i'm the one who's changed and i no longer fit in or some scary prospect
i can't believe i'm leaving australia i love australia
apart from the ants that ARE CRAWLING ALL OVER MY LEGS RIGHT NOW why are there ants in my roooooom
and phil said i will contradict wanting to grow my hair down to the floor and that i'll come back with a bob
are you crazy my hair iz crazy and couldn't handle a bob eerrr i feel so uneasy about everything and my heart hurts
firstly, although i'm so appreciative i don't want to go with the burden of having to turn up in a certain place at a certain time
and secondly, how the heck am i going to manage being away from all my lovelies for a year?!?!? i'll get back and everyone will have changed but i wont have or i'll think everyone's changed but i'm the one who's changed and i no longer fit in or some scary prospect
i can't believe i'm leaving australia i love australia
apart from the ants that ARE CRAWLING ALL OVER MY LEGS RIGHT NOW why are there ants in my roooooom
and phil said i will contradict wanting to grow my hair down to the floor and that i'll come back with a bob
are you crazy my hair iz crazy and couldn't handle a bob eerrr i feel so uneasy about everything and my heart hurts
Sunday, October 21, 2007
The Naughty Birthday Boy Causes A Little Bit of Trouble
in hindsight, the 2007 english hsc paper was soooo easy!! all of paper 2 was essays, the questions were fairly straight forward and broad and they didn't name any texts that you had to discuss. despite this, i still managed to screw it up! haha, i don't think i did that bad actually. coming out of any english exam i've always thought 'that sucked so bad i went so bad' and i end up getting decent marks, and with this english exam i came out thinking 'dood that was pretty breezey i think i did ok' so i'm hoping i get very decent marks
this is so gross how i'm talking about exams i'm basically one of those people who i despise who chat on 'bored' of studies and disgusting things like that ewwwww gross
friday was jobe's birthday. it was being celebrated at his friends place in newport but i can call him sam because we both want to travel the southern states of the usa and we both know joy omg. it was a pleasant gathering i finally met all the characters jobe raves about and i could put a face to them it was nice. charline was in charge of the fire she has really great outdoors skills for a french person? is that a relevant analogy probably not. the night was quite a ruckus for the birthday boy in the sense that some passer-bys slash trespassers got a ruski bottle to the head, and later when we were meant to be eating birthday cake and avoiding jobe's kiss we were confronted with a loud crash as our outside table was upturned by the recievers of the bottle to the head shennanigan. ahah long story short, jobe tries to fight them or something crazy forgetting that he's the male equivalent of twiggy, we go out, parents come out, things are (sort of) resolved but the guy who looked like a pig was still making rude gestures. and later on we almost got a bottle to the head as one sailed out of the air from their direction
jobe got sad
then got mad
sam and i watched on as charline attempted to crack the silent and angry exterior. then i was asked to try because i've known him longest. so what do i do? while he's seemingly sleeping standing up i prod him with my finger and he topples over and smashes into the ground ahaa. charline and sam come back and i'm all like.. what? he tries to walk into the water and i manage to redirect him to the car and we say our goodbyes to sam and jobe is folded into the car. i drop charline home then i drop jobe home and my eyes sting from the lethal smoke of the fire
an enjoyable birthday? yes
this is so gross how i'm talking about exams i'm basically one of those people who i despise who chat on 'bored' of studies and disgusting things like that ewwwww gross
friday was jobe's birthday. it was being celebrated at his friends place in newport but i can call him sam because we both want to travel the southern states of the usa and we both know joy omg. it was a pleasant gathering i finally met all the characters jobe raves about and i could put a face to them it was nice. charline was in charge of the fire she has really great outdoors skills for a french person? is that a relevant analogy probably not. the night was quite a ruckus for the birthday boy in the sense that some passer-bys slash trespassers got a ruski bottle to the head, and later when we were meant to be eating birthday cake and avoiding jobe's kiss we were confronted with a loud crash as our outside table was upturned by the recievers of the bottle to the head shennanigan. ahah long story short, jobe tries to fight them or something crazy forgetting that he's the male equivalent of twiggy, we go out, parents come out, things are (sort of) resolved but the guy who looked like a pig was still making rude gestures. and later on we almost got a bottle to the head as one sailed out of the air from their direction
jobe got sad
then got mad
sam and i watched on as charline attempted to crack the silent and angry exterior. then i was asked to try because i've known him longest. so what do i do? while he's seemingly sleeping standing up i prod him with my finger and he topples over and smashes into the ground ahaa. charline and sam come back and i'm all like.. what? he tries to walk into the water and i manage to redirect him to the car and we say our goodbyes to sam and jobe is folded into the car. i drop charline home then i drop jobe home and my eyes sting from the lethal smoke of the fire
an enjoyable birthday? yes
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
(FAUX) BOMB ON THE FRONT, SNEERING-TYPE
these next couple of photos are from saturday i think it was, at surry hills. i'm not sure how i feel about this area, it seems kind of like a country in itself, with its own breed of human. and they gave out heaps of free chips for some reason. phil and i discussed if we would rather live in that suburb next year, but we'll just see where we end up when the time comes. anyway, it was Georgie, Dani, Philk, Ben and I. it was a really nice day, i had a really nice food but i can't remember the name of it anymore. it was a pancake type thing that had spinach and cheese hidden inside, with lemon on top. i saw the illin'est trillin'est kid eva! i think taking a photo of him is illegal? or is it just frowned upon? well, i had the decency not to get his face. i didn't take a photo in time, but before this shot he was wearing a floor length cape, and you can't see it but on his front he had a fake bomb strapped on! hahahahah new feat. check it out:
HATE LIST
Over the last 2 weeks or so, i've been home in the daytime a lot more than usual. during this time, the majority of which i was not studying :(. or is that :)? anyway, during this time, i compiled a sort of mental hate list. it covers a very narrow scope, seeing as all i've really been doing is swimming, reading, sitting at a desk staring at an essay question on an otherwise blank page, and typing summary notes on the computer. ok, so here it is:
1. pool spiders
2. any form of bug that thinks it's ok to cool off in my pool. land and you DIEEE
3. in particular the one wasp that hangs around while i'm trying to do the treading water exercise
4. pool cleaners (mechanical) with an appetite
5. when the pool net handle stick thing disappears because dad fashioned a long tree cutting (dangerous) device
6. the hens that leave shit all over the grass, this is so much worse when i have wet feet
7. nice bugs that i feel obliged to save. okayyy this should actually go on my love list
8. how i always fall asleep when i start to read and then i wake up and it's like, 6pm?!?!?!?
9. modern history
10. the 'imaginative journey'
11. Samuel T. Coleridge. his nonsensical nonsense was once mildly enjoyable but no longer is
12. rosencrantz and guildenstern are dead. i LOATHE you. you should be in the list of things i want to kill even after yo already dead
13. my sore typing hand
14. the board of studies. i can't believe you would be SO cruel to state that you have the ability to ask for any form of textual response, plus the ability to specify any poem or speech or bullshit like that. fuck you!
15. the number 8 key. why are you so loose?
that is all currently. i'm going to go and watch 'stripshow,' i really just love that show! if one of those guys stripped for me i think i would ... well i wouldn't know what to do. scream and lock myself in a cupboard, or something
on a more positive note, i did about 6 hours of study today !!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!1111111!!
OR IS THAT NEGATIVE?
1. pool spiders
2. any form of bug that thinks it's ok to cool off in my pool. land and you DIEEE
3. in particular the one wasp that hangs around while i'm trying to do the treading water exercise
4. pool cleaners (mechanical) with an appetite
5. when the pool net handle stick thing disappears because dad fashioned a long tree cutting (dangerous) device
6. the hens that leave shit all over the grass, this is so much worse when i have wet feet
7. nice bugs that i feel obliged to save. okayyy this should actually go on my love list
8. how i always fall asleep when i start to read and then i wake up and it's like, 6pm?!?!?!?
9. modern history
10. the 'imaginative journey'
11. Samuel T. Coleridge. his nonsensical nonsense was once mildly enjoyable but no longer is
12. rosencrantz and guildenstern are dead. i LOATHE you. you should be in the list of things i want to kill even after yo already dead
13. my sore typing hand
14. the board of studies. i can't believe you would be SO cruel to state that you have the ability to ask for any form of textual response, plus the ability to specify any poem or speech or bullshit like that. fuck you!
15. the number 8 key. why are you so loose?
that is all currently. i'm going to go and watch 'stripshow,' i really just love that show! if one of those guys stripped for me i think i would ... well i wouldn't know what to do. scream and lock myself in a cupboard, or something
on a more positive note, i did about 6 hours of study today !!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!1111111!!
OR IS THAT NEGATIVE?
Friday, October 12, 2007
Sometimes bad nicknames are good in the long run!
The other day a phrase or conversation or something similar i heard was about bad nicknames and if you'd ever had one (i was eavesdropping. oh wait i remember now i was on the bus!!) and that got me thinking have i ever had a bad nickname? i was thinking for quite a while and i was quite sure i never had, but then i remembered when i was in form 7 at intermediate school in wellington, NZ i had one!! i think i was like 11 or 12 or something, and i was a really, really skinny caucasian twig girl, surrounded by ALOT of giant islander girls. i was just a tiny underdeveloped white girl because i was young and still skinnier than my brother, but the majority of the girls surrounding me were the kind that grew breasts the minute they came out of the womb, ya know? trainer bras and nappies. so i got nicknamed "surfboard." because i was as flat as a surfboard! hahahahah i'm glad i recovered that memory because shame to them now i'm nice and proportional whereas they'll struggle to find attractive lingerie and probably have pushed out a couple of babies by now suckaaaas
Thursday, October 11, 2007
An English Rose Hanging On My Wall
yesterday afternoon phil came over and we sat on the balcony for a while engaging in pleasant conversation and nibbling on some delicious white chocolate from Aldi. he noticed that my mother had a new top, she really likes phil and his delicate mannerisms. omg! i showed him that dress i'd bought off eBay and he shared my shock of how different it was from the picture! quite hideous really, but i don't have enough confidence to leave negative feedback. we went out to get a drink, got slightly distracted from the quest for a drink and ended up in the n'bridge oppy where i bought an old crusty painting of some flowers. one of the ladies, noticing that i liked flowers tried to interest me with some disgusting floral saucers, phil made some excuse and boy we got out of there quickly. it's true that i want clashing floral pieces but the colour scheme wasn't cool ugly-tacky, it was just ugly ugly-tacky!
we popped in Mrs Watson which is this really nice store just a few doors down and the lady always stocks really nice dresses. we talked to her for a while and she didn't seem insulted at all that we didn't want to buy anything in her store, but she gave us directions to all these other cool stores. she had the most fabulous wallpaper! we decided we must get some for our dilapidated apartment that we're living in near the end of next year.
so we went to this really cute store that had really cute neighbouring stores as well. this lady who owned it just had this air of class and superiority that was sooo appealing for that age (50+). it had all these old sewing patterns from the 1960's and elegant gloves and really, really big-name vintage apparel! and a+ squeaky wooden floors
we finally settled for a drink in a cafe at the crag, and for a can of diet coke, tiny friande (spelling?) and even tinier portugese tart it was $12!! i thought it was ridiculous, but the price was justified when across the road, hair billowing in the wind and general wonderfulness radiating from him to my (smashed!) heart i see ***. you know, the one i hadn't seen in two years blah blah blah. it was cruel. so cruel. and once again, one moment he was there and the next he was goneeeeeeee
8 DAYS UNTIL THE HSC!!! WOOOOOOOOOO MAN I'M SO EXCITED 3 WEEKS OF PURE DELIGHT!!
blah
we popped in Mrs Watson which is this really nice store just a few doors down and the lady always stocks really nice dresses. we talked to her for a while and she didn't seem insulted at all that we didn't want to buy anything in her store, but she gave us directions to all these other cool stores. she had the most fabulous wallpaper! we decided we must get some for our dilapidated apartment that we're living in near the end of next year.
so we went to this really cute store that had really cute neighbouring stores as well. this lady who owned it just had this air of class and superiority that was sooo appealing for that age (50+). it had all these old sewing patterns from the 1960's and elegant gloves and really, really big-name vintage apparel! and a+ squeaky wooden floors
we finally settled for a drink in a cafe at the crag, and for a can of diet coke, tiny friande (spelling?) and even tinier portugese tart it was $12!! i thought it was ridiculous, but the price was justified when across the road, hair billowing in the wind and general wonderfulness radiating from him to my (smashed!) heart i see ***. you know, the one i hadn't seen in two years blah blah blah. it was cruel. so cruel. and once again, one moment he was there and the next he was goneeeeeeee
8 DAYS UNTIL THE HSC!!! WOOOOOOOOOO MAN I'M SO EXCITED 3 WEEKS OF PURE DELIGHT!!
blah
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Kody
Kody sat down on the avenue
He tapped his feet, to the humming of the highway
He watched the light shine down on the broken glass and thought
I don't got no reasons, yet
There it is and there it was
It was clear to all of us
We kept this hat of broken dreams
And we pulled them out, when we needed them around
So please hand me the bottle, I think I'm lonely now
And please give me direction, I think the hurt set in
And I don't feel nothing
There's a squeak hinge down on the back gate
It lets us know if he comes around
I don't sleep that good anyway
If you've never heard that silence, it's a God awful sound
I don't feel nothing, no I don't feel nothing
There's nothing to feel good about here
Don't much get down to the avenue
I could drive, but it takes so much to get there
Don't get off on all the broken glass, the cadillac scene,
Well
I've seen a lot of good things die and I'm
In an over emotional way
He tapped his feet, to the humming of the highway
He watched the light shine down on the broken glass and thought
I don't got no reasons, yet
There it is and there it was
It was clear to all of us
We kept this hat of broken dreams
And we pulled them out, when we needed them around
So please hand me the bottle, I think I'm lonely now
And please give me direction, I think the hurt set in
And I don't feel nothing
There's a squeak hinge down on the back gate
It lets us know if he comes around
I don't sleep that good anyway
If you've never heard that silence, it's a God awful sound
I don't feel nothing, no I don't feel nothing
There's nothing to feel good about here
Don't much get down to the avenue
I could drive, but it takes so much to get there
Don't get off on all the broken glass, the cadillac scene,
Well
I've seen a lot of good things die and I'm
In an over emotional way
oh jobe pass me your exquisite knife collection
argghh tonight sucked so bad it was just shit
last week i'd already said that i would pick up my parents from the airport so i had to go do that and when i'd gotten on the road i realised that there had always been someone with me when i'd driven to the airport so i was like fuck i'm totally winging this (i'm a really, really bad navigator) and it was alright i made it to the bondi / randwick turnoff all sweet infact i actually made it to the airport pretty ok but then i was trying to get into this tiny carparking spot and i got all flustered because cars were banking up and i backed out and scraped the mother fucker of a wide car on my left and i thought it didn't do any damage then i get out and there's this gashhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh all down the side. fuck! then i realise that i've never picked anyone up from the domestic terminal only the international so i'm sitting on some fucking hard bench glaring at everyone who stared at my stupid hat because my hair was dirty and waited a lifetime in a general area because i'd forgotten the flight number
then because i was so mad i'd forgotten completely where i'd parked and we literally spent about 20 minutes looking for it
the air is already tense
they see the scratch
i insulted the stupid picture of a tiger my little (cough BIG) brother had bought and you could've cut the silence with a knife on the drive back home
i tried to lighten the atmostphere, "hey do you guys know of the band evermore? i met them on sunday" and no one replied. 20 seconds later, mum goes "ah..no..chris?" dad remains silent
fuck this i feel like running away but actually just pitching a tent on the local oval so i can be left alone with no cars to scratch, no one to pick up and in general no commitments to burden my already burdened mind
but i'd probz be murdered or something
oh yeah and because i was so angry when jobe called i briskly turned down seeing angus and julia stone even though they had a free way in. regret sinks in!!!!
mer
i feel like i aged about 5 years tonight
last week i'd already said that i would pick up my parents from the airport so i had to go do that and when i'd gotten on the road i realised that there had always been someone with me when i'd driven to the airport so i was like fuck i'm totally winging this (i'm a really, really bad navigator) and it was alright i made it to the bondi / randwick turnoff all sweet infact i actually made it to the airport pretty ok but then i was trying to get into this tiny carparking spot and i got all flustered because cars were banking up and i backed out and scraped the mother fucker of a wide car on my left and i thought it didn't do any damage then i get out and there's this gashhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh all down the side. fuck! then i realise that i've never picked anyone up from the domestic terminal only the international so i'm sitting on some fucking hard bench glaring at everyone who stared at my stupid hat because my hair was dirty and waited a lifetime in a general area because i'd forgotten the flight number
then because i was so mad i'd forgotten completely where i'd parked and we literally spent about 20 minutes looking for it
the air is already tense
they see the scratch
i insulted the stupid picture of a tiger my little (cough BIG) brother had bought and you could've cut the silence with a knife on the drive back home
i tried to lighten the atmostphere, "hey do you guys know of the band evermore? i met them on sunday" and no one replied. 20 seconds later, mum goes "ah..no..chris?" dad remains silent
fuck this i feel like running away but actually just pitching a tent on the local oval so i can be left alone with no cars to scratch, no one to pick up and in general no commitments to burden my already burdened mind
but i'd probz be murdered or something
oh yeah and because i was so angry when jobe called i briskly turned down seeing angus and julia stone even though they had a free way in. regret sinks in!!!!
mer
i feel like i aged about 5 years tonight
little birrrrdy in my kitchen!
distractions always tempt me and they always win! i had just sat down to do some study this afternoon and about 3 minutes into this horrid session i hear a strange noise coming from the kitchen and i'm all like what is that? so i get up and alas there are two naughty magpies indulging in my cats bowl! eating their cat biscuits! this diversion was highly appreciated so i ran to get my cam and in my enthusiasm i scared one away but i managed to get a picture of one of the little devils eating and a video of him trip trapping around my (filthy thanks to tom and i) kitchen!
look!
bored? clearly!
love, me
look!
bored? clearly!
love, me
Saturday, October 6, 2007
In Between Days
i didn't get a wink of sleep last night!
i got to bed at about 2 and it was just tom and i in the house and he'd been tucked in for ages i think so i locked up and read for a bit and at 3 someone called my house phone and i let it ring out and they didn't hang up for the message bank, whoever called just left the phone engaged
then i started freaking the fuck out like holy shit either there's some burglars who know my fam's outta town and are calling to confirm, or there's a murderer in the house trying to get me up so he can slash my throat
so i stayed in a completely still foetal position with my light on with my hands curled around my cellular waiting to dial 000 until the sun was up
i heard so many noises and door handles but when i felt brave enough to check because the sun was now up there was no one there
i think i'm developing mild paranoia or schizophrenia, because i have this constant belief that someone is following me and trying to kill me and that they can always hear my thoughts
it's not healthy i think i need help but i don't know i'm pretty sure there is someone on my tail. on my trail
i got to bed at about 2 and it was just tom and i in the house and he'd been tucked in for ages i think so i locked up and read for a bit and at 3 someone called my house phone and i let it ring out and they didn't hang up for the message bank, whoever called just left the phone engaged
then i started freaking the fuck out like holy shit either there's some burglars who know my fam's outta town and are calling to confirm, or there's a murderer in the house trying to get me up so he can slash my throat
so i stayed in a completely still foetal position with my light on with my hands curled around my cellular waiting to dial 000 until the sun was up
i heard so many noises and door handles but when i felt brave enough to check because the sun was now up there was no one there
i think i'm developing mild paranoia or schizophrenia, because i have this constant belief that someone is following me and trying to kill me and that they can always hear my thoughts
it's not healthy i think i need help but i don't know i'm pretty sure there is someone on my tail. on my trail
Friday, October 5, 2007
You Say I'm Crazy I Say I'm Passionate. Hymn To The Sea
Tonight i watched my favourite film and in my opinion the saddest, for the first time in 10 years
Titanic went to the cinema in 1997 and i remember it so clearly, i was only seven years old and my dad took Tom and i, and i remember sitting in my chair and Tom was on my left letting the folding chair eat him because the pounding water scared him. If he had maybe faced his fears and looked at me he would have seen an emotion he'd never seen me wear before, but one that he would see more and more as i got older and more thoughtful and solitary and unstable. i was only 7 but i remember that it was the saddest i'd ever felt and i hoped and hoped not that i would find love and have it snatched away within a matter of days, but just that i could have that and die if that's what had to happen
10 years later i'm 17 and Rose was seventeen when she met Jack so i thought it time that i finally watch again. i'd put it off for sooooososososo long because i kinda didn't want to cry but i did watch it and i cried so much! it made me feel so many things but already half of those feelings have gone but
but
i think that was what i mainly felt... nothing lasts forever ..kinda? everything goes. and everyone is so small in the great scheme of things
Jack and Rose, fictional or not (take your pick the debate is forever ripe), found the most beautiful and astounding love, perhaps one in a million, one in a hundred million would have a glimpse of something similar. but there are six billion six hundred two million two hundred twenty-four thousand one hundred seventy-five people on our planet alone!! it's so special but so what?
if your main aim was to be remembered, you'd be screwed. Jack won his tickets on the maiden voyage of Titanic therefore there was no record of his time on Titanic. his parents died when he was 15, he had no siblings. travelling the world as he pleased, he had no ties anywhere. Rose was the most important person in his life and, really, the only person, and now he's dead he only is remembered in Rose's memory but she's 101 she's JUST ABOUT FUCKING DEAD and she lived for you Jack she never let go of the promise but everything ends and the most amazing person in the world leaves no trace of himself, she goes and he dies again, his existence disappears, did he even exist?
i always thought i wanted to be remembered but it seems a stupid quest which i don't really intend to embark upon in this life anymore. People always say 17 is so young but are you crazy?! it's not. Jack died when he was 20 and Rose lost Jack when she was 17 and time flies so fast that before i know it i'll be dead or have done nothing i'm proud of. i'm not going to wait another 10 years for a realisation like this, i seriously have to get out of this fucking country and find something worth living, or dieing for. i want that love and that feeling of self sacrifice that i've never had because my life is running out in all senses! i don't care if i die just as i've discovered something worthwhile, because that's better than meandering around until you're 30 or 50 or 100 and your looks and soul have withered with your pointless existence, and all hope is gone. i don't care if i'm not remembered and if my memory dies with the only person i ever shared my life with because i'm in this for me, and only those i care about. i guess you only do get one life and knowing me i'll be killed or i'll kill myself before it starts losing momentum BECAUSE THAT'S A LIFE WORTH BEING LIVED, isn't it!?
i just don't care if it rips me apart or worse, i'm 17 and i have about 5 months left until i'm an 'adult' and i just can't fucking handle that, i have to get outta here in 4 months tops and be small in the big scheme of things and be forgotten in the uncontrollable death of things and be passionate and just generally live. love and be loved and then be forgotten
it's the role i was handed it's the luck i plan to find
no one lasts forever so follow your dreams and do it quickly, if love is what you want do it and then be done with it. it's your wonderful life but billions of other people have theirs too, don't waste time with tactics and making an eternal mark, it's in vanity. the unsinkable ship will sink, you be sure of it, so do what you have to do before it sinks or even better get killed in the process, in the intensity of it.
however many tears, i know i plan to!
"Make it count"
Titanic went to the cinema in 1997 and i remember it so clearly, i was only seven years old and my dad took Tom and i, and i remember sitting in my chair and Tom was on my left letting the folding chair eat him because the pounding water scared him. If he had maybe faced his fears and looked at me he would have seen an emotion he'd never seen me wear before, but one that he would see more and more as i got older and more thoughtful and solitary and unstable. i was only 7 but i remember that it was the saddest i'd ever felt and i hoped and hoped not that i would find love and have it snatched away within a matter of days, but just that i could have that and die if that's what had to happen
10 years later i'm 17 and Rose was seventeen when she met Jack so i thought it time that i finally watch again. i'd put it off for sooooososososo long because i kinda didn't want to cry but i did watch it and i cried so much! it made me feel so many things but already half of those feelings have gone but
but
i think that was what i mainly felt... nothing lasts forever ..kinda? everything goes. and everyone is so small in the great scheme of things
Jack and Rose, fictional or not (take your pick the debate is forever ripe), found the most beautiful and astounding love, perhaps one in a million, one in a hundred million would have a glimpse of something similar. but there are six billion six hundred two million two hundred twenty-four thousand one hundred seventy-five people on our planet alone!! it's so special but so what?
if your main aim was to be remembered, you'd be screwed. Jack won his tickets on the maiden voyage of Titanic therefore there was no record of his time on Titanic. his parents died when he was 15, he had no siblings. travelling the world as he pleased, he had no ties anywhere. Rose was the most important person in his life and, really, the only person, and now he's dead he only is remembered in Rose's memory but she's 101 she's JUST ABOUT FUCKING DEAD and she lived for you Jack she never let go of the promise but everything ends and the most amazing person in the world leaves no trace of himself, she goes and he dies again, his existence disappears, did he even exist?
i always thought i wanted to be remembered but it seems a stupid quest which i don't really intend to embark upon in this life anymore. People always say 17 is so young but are you crazy?! it's not. Jack died when he was 20 and Rose lost Jack when she was 17 and time flies so fast that before i know it i'll be dead or have done nothing i'm proud of. i'm not going to wait another 10 years for a realisation like this, i seriously have to get out of this fucking country and find something worth living, or dieing for. i want that love and that feeling of self sacrifice that i've never had because my life is running out in all senses! i don't care if i die just as i've discovered something worthwhile, because that's better than meandering around until you're 30 or 50 or 100 and your looks and soul have withered with your pointless existence, and all hope is gone. i don't care if i'm not remembered and if my memory dies with the only person i ever shared my life with because i'm in this for me, and only those i care about. i guess you only do get one life and knowing me i'll be killed or i'll kill myself before it starts losing momentum BECAUSE THAT'S A LIFE WORTH BEING LIVED, isn't it!?
i just don't care if it rips me apart or worse, i'm 17 and i have about 5 months left until i'm an 'adult' and i just can't fucking handle that, i have to get outta here in 4 months tops and be small in the big scheme of things and be forgotten in the uncontrollable death of things and be passionate and just generally live. love and be loved and then be forgotten
it's the role i was handed it's the luck i plan to find
no one lasts forever so follow your dreams and do it quickly, if love is what you want do it and then be done with it. it's your wonderful life but billions of other people have theirs too, don't waste time with tactics and making an eternal mark, it's in vanity. the unsinkable ship will sink, you be sure of it, so do what you have to do before it sinks or even better get killed in the process, in the intensity of it.
however many tears, i know i plan to!
"Make it count"
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
Daniel Kymona & Ratchell
went to the beach yesterday but didn't swim
went to sell chocolates yesterday but we were too scared to approach fellow teenagers or even pre-pubescents. we were the geeks that day
went to get a calippo but they only had tropical?!
still ate it
went to danielle's house with no appetite but ate a pb sandVICH and drank gallons of water and watched sum crime. waited ages for BOOORADLEY but he didn't show and dk is going to the central coast for the weekend with georgette
went to my house for a swim but didn't swim because it was ffreezing!
watched the MASK. smokin'!
i have an empty house from friday through till tuesday !
i did 2.5 hours of study this morning and sushi awaits this arvenin' yayyyyyyy
went to sell chocolates yesterday but we were too scared to approach fellow teenagers or even pre-pubescents. we were the geeks that day
went to get a calippo but they only had tropical?!
still ate it
went to danielle's house with no appetite but ate a pb sandVICH and drank gallons of water and watched sum crime. waited ages for BOOORADLEY but he didn't show and dk is going to the central coast for the weekend with georgette
went to my house for a swim but didn't swim because it was ffreezing!
watched the MASK. smokin'!
i have an empty house from friday through till tuesday !
i did 2.5 hours of study this morning and sushi awaits this arvenin' yayyyyyyy
All I Ever Wanted Was Your Life
My mouth fell open Hoping that the truth Would not be true Refuse the news
I'm feeling sick now What the fuck am I Supposed to do? Just lose and lose
First time I saw you You were sitting Backstage in a dress A perfect mess
You never knew this But I wanted badly for you too Requite my love
Left on the floor Leaving your body When highs are the lows And lows are the way
So hard to stay Guess now you know I love you so
I liked your whiskers And I liked the Dimple in your chin Your pale blue eyes
You painted pictures Cause the one Who hurts Can give so much
You gave me such
I'm feeling sick now What the fuck am I Supposed to do? Just lose and lose
First time I saw you You were sitting Backstage in a dress A perfect mess
You never knew this But I wanted badly for you too Requite my love
Left on the floor Leaving your body When highs are the lows And lows are the way
So hard to stay Guess now you know I love you so
I liked your whiskers And I liked the Dimple in your chin Your pale blue eyes
You painted pictures Cause the one Who hurts Can give so much
You gave me such
Monday, October 1, 2007
WHO ARE PARENTS? explained
last night was really fun, at around 6pm dhan and i made a crazy run to the bottle shop because we thought maybe they would close early being a public holiday and also made an icecream dash at manly, i had vanilla with gummi bears and twix mmmmm. we were joined by ro & phil.
then i went homeskies and had a quick slice or two of pizza den went to dani k's. just a small group, dhan, phil, ben, lora, jake and myself.
i was the official measurer in regards to BEN OR PHIL> WHO HAS SKINNER TOP THIGH?
i think i gave phil the title and ben got a bit pouty
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
what the crap was this bird up to? thinking back it can't have been too healthy, walking along the road in the middle of the night and coming across a small bird sleeping standing up on the front lawn???? oh poor little guy i bet he's dead
so we stopped at marcus's place, then walked lora home . phil was trying to peg a dead lizard at me, cunt. we all climbed in the teensy back seat which is bens datsun, sat there for a while but some how everyone had disappeared and it was just ben and i chatting. i think i mainly complained how i couldn't move much and there wasn't much available oxygen!
phil walked me part of the way home but jeez i was so scared again, and looking back i must have been incredibly wasted because i was running down the middle of a 6-lane bridge (by myself) jumping over the waist-high barrier every few seconds so the axe murderers couldn't get a swing at me. knowing me i was probably sooking like a little girl because i was so scared. then a car came and i was like shit im in the middle of this fucking bridge so i ran down the path calling tom to pick me up or i'm gonna dieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
he did!
haha i got a message in the morning from phil saying "are you alive or did the man in the bushes get you?" clearly i was a mess but i would have actually had the same outlook despite my mental state!
fun night
then i went homeskies and had a quick slice or two of pizza den went to dani k's. just a small group, dhan, phil, ben, lora, jake and myself.
i was the official measurer in regards to BEN OR PHIL> WHO HAS SKINNER TOP THIGH?
i think i gave phil the title and ben got a bit pouty
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
what the crap was this bird up to? thinking back it can't have been too healthy, walking along the road in the middle of the night and coming across a small bird sleeping standing up on the front lawn???? oh poor little guy i bet he's dead
so we stopped at marcus's place, then walked lora home . phil was trying to peg a dead lizard at me, cunt. we all climbed in the teensy back seat which is bens datsun, sat there for a while but some how everyone had disappeared and it was just ben and i chatting. i think i mainly complained how i couldn't move much and there wasn't much available oxygen!
phil walked me part of the way home but jeez i was so scared again, and looking back i must have been incredibly wasted because i was running down the middle of a 6-lane bridge (by myself) jumping over the waist-high barrier every few seconds so the axe murderers couldn't get a swing at me. knowing me i was probably sooking like a little girl because i was so scared. then a car came and i was like shit im in the middle of this fucking bridge so i ran down the path calling tom to pick me up or i'm gonna dieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
he did!
haha i got a message in the morning from phil saying "are you alive or did the man in the bushes get you?" clearly i was a mess but i would have actually had the same outlook despite my mental state!
fun night
WHO ARE PARENTS?
mayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyn today im sposed to start studying for the HSC but its 2 in the morn and im blazed as a dog. hahah i had the best night i cant ewait to look at the photos that ben took of us with a sleeping bird ahaha i dont think ive ever laughed so much in m liife in fact i cant believe i did a public something in fact i cant believe i am not sleeping so ii can study bright and early i loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ma life and birds who sleep standing up on lawns :)
Sunday, September 30, 2007
reeeeow BITE
oh sweet nuthingz haha i can't believe i called a faceless population homos and told possibly no one to SCRAM! unscram yourselves it was just an expression of emotion i was feeling at the time
i didn't do much of anything today, it was suprisingly... refreshing perhaps? turned down the occasion of 'parklife' with my friends squillions of years ago given it really was not my idea of fun and the id thing is just too annoying, turned down jobe's offer of going to his friends house in newport i think. i'm wayyy too anti-social for an intimate setting like that! i would love to be able to achieve a sociable quality in an environment like that but to put it bluntly it's not going to happen it's just my personality!
so i woke up quite late.. 11ish maybe. contemplated going for a dip in the water but pushed it out of my mind. we have hens now and quite frankly they really piss me off and i avoid crossing paths with them. they are pushy and aggressive and scare away other friendly birds that i might like to feed and also my beautiful cats. fuckers!!! i dusted the skirting boards of my room to 60's surf/garage rock, read a book that jobe bought for me for $2 ( to jobe- i was right it IS extremely cliched and predictable yet still enjoyable, thanks for the gift darlin') sat on the deck with lucy my cat for a while with a big icy beverage of some special power juice, listened to some more surf genre slash southern hillbillyish genre musik, ate some icing that mum had leftover from a ginger cake she was making and then ate some of the finished product! now my cat monty is sitting next to me
so as a result of this fine sunday i have come to the conclusion that
a) i am extremely un-sociable, and
b) i spend wayyy too much time with my cats
but i'm so happy! obviously something is right in this arrangement!
i didn't do much of anything today, it was suprisingly... refreshing perhaps? turned down the occasion of 'parklife' with my friends squillions of years ago given it really was not my idea of fun and the id thing is just too annoying, turned down jobe's offer of going to his friends house in newport i think. i'm wayyy too anti-social for an intimate setting like that! i would love to be able to achieve a sociable quality in an environment like that but to put it bluntly it's not going to happen it's just my personality!
so i woke up quite late.. 11ish maybe. contemplated going for a dip in the water but pushed it out of my mind. we have hens now and quite frankly they really piss me off and i avoid crossing paths with them. they are pushy and aggressive and scare away other friendly birds that i might like to feed and also my beautiful cats. fuckers!!! i dusted the skirting boards of my room to 60's surf/garage rock, read a book that jobe bought for me for $2 ( to jobe- i was right it IS extremely cliched and predictable yet still enjoyable, thanks for the gift darlin') sat on the deck with lucy my cat for a while with a big icy beverage of some special power juice, listened to some more surf genre slash southern hillbillyish genre musik, ate some icing that mum had leftover from a ginger cake she was making and then ate some of the finished product! now my cat monty is sitting next to me
so as a result of this fine sunday i have come to the conclusion that
a) i am extremely un-sociable, and
b) i spend wayyy too much time with my cats
but i'm so happy! obviously something is right in this arrangement!
Friday, September 28, 2007
27/09/07
I just have to back track a little, back to Thursday 27/09/07. a special occassion given that school finished!
morning started at ro's place, food and drinks, (i was late) then we all made the short trip to school. the farewell assembly probably was the best ever! a chronological order of photos from y7-y12 showed that thankfully our looks had improved :)
this photo was from our last proper day of school on wednesday. ms martin is our biology teacher and she's from avalon (did a bit too much druggie drugs in her youth therefore) and everyone hates her because she's real crap and forgets names but this morning she made us all breakfast and gave us biology mugs !! so she's liked now
farewell assembly
we knew katie would be the first!
after this we all went for more drinks and food at the park
stayed here for majority of the afternoon it was reallllllllly nice and tasty
ew then we had to have formal graduation at night. a waste of my life it completely destroyed the wonderful farewell assembly vibe. basically, it was hell boring, when i went up to get my certificate and miss morrison aka 'morry' said "after school rachel plans to grow her hair down to the floor" all the adults laughed and then morry screwed up the my final sentence and i got stuck on stage going 'mer!.' i didnt actually mind that it added some character i thought but later phil told me she rung him and was all like 'is rachel angry!' nooooooo but he said yes :) so i guess i have a favour coming my way
then it was more drinks at chrissos. weird stuff happened, ie **** AND HOLLY. fuck i'll never get overz that one, i'm meant to be carrying his child
i took this photo on the way home i just thought it was so cute the furry little possum kept staring naaw!
i think i will add that the walk home through the bush track was disgusting i could feel millions of eyes on me everyone thinks im just paranoid but you'll see i'm right when one day you find my body with an axe lodged in my forehead wahhhh :( !
next day jobeus and i went opshopping/ smoothie drinking. i was really tired. clearly it was now 28/09/07.
morning started at ro's place, food and drinks, (i was late) then we all made the short trip to school. the farewell assembly probably was the best ever! a chronological order of photos from y7-y12 showed that thankfully our looks had improved :)
this photo was from our last proper day of school on wednesday. ms martin is our biology teacher and she's from avalon (did a bit too much druggie drugs in her youth therefore) and everyone hates her because she's real crap and forgets names but this morning she made us all breakfast and gave us biology mugs !! so she's liked now
farewell assembly
we knew katie would be the first!
after this we all went for more drinks and food at the park
stayed here for majority of the afternoon it was reallllllllly nice and tasty
ew then we had to have formal graduation at night. a waste of my life it completely destroyed the wonderful farewell assembly vibe. basically, it was hell boring, when i went up to get my certificate and miss morrison aka 'morry' said "after school rachel plans to grow her hair down to the floor" all the adults laughed and then morry screwed up the my final sentence and i got stuck on stage going 'mer!.' i didnt actually mind that it added some character i thought but later phil told me she rung him and was all like 'is rachel angry!' nooooooo but he said yes :) so i guess i have a favour coming my way
then it was more drinks at chrissos. weird stuff happened, ie **** AND HOLLY. fuck i'll never get overz that one, i'm meant to be carrying his child
i took this photo on the way home i just thought it was so cute the furry little possum kept staring naaw!
i think i will add that the walk home through the bush track was disgusting i could feel millions of eyes on me everyone thinks im just paranoid but you'll see i'm right when one day you find my body with an axe lodged in my forehead wahhhh :( !
next day jobeus and i went opshopping/ smoothie drinking. i was really tired. clearly it was now 28/09/07.
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
And i hoped they would prick themselves and fall asleep for a thousand years
i'm really over the whole 'pale complexion / dark clothes / the whole group dresses the same' trend. i like pale skin, but not when it's the trend and you actually avoid being an australian and going outside to prevent a tan which would come naturally to you. (but if you're naturally pale that's pretty)
and when you see groups of people and they're all wearing the same black jeans or tights, black leather jackets or trench coats, black high necked tops and group-wide 'disinterested' attitudes etc. it makes me wonder is this really your personality? because your non-conformist exterior is actually the conformist now, everyone does it so shame. summer is around the fucken corner don't deny the rites of spring. also in your big groups it kinda looks like you all came from the same mother who dresses ya in the morning or something!. this isn't a rant, i don't even know why i'm concerning myself with this i guess it's just a casual opinion and i have many opinions. i like wearing black so maybe i'm just a hypocrite but at least there's a bit of variety in the gang. it's not like is that a girl or a boy? do they know how to smile? it's not my fault if you get offended because it's not like you share your thoughts homos .you just reading mine. SERIOUSLY scram! why do i even do this shit on the internet!
in contrast, so far this day has been perfect
and when you see groups of people and they're all wearing the same black jeans or tights, black leather jackets or trench coats, black high necked tops and group-wide 'disinterested' attitudes etc. it makes me wonder is this really your personality? because your non-conformist exterior is actually the conformist now, everyone does it so shame. summer is around the fucken corner don't deny the rites of spring. also in your big groups it kinda looks like you all came from the same mother who dresses ya in the morning or something!. this isn't a rant, i don't even know why i'm concerning myself with this i guess it's just a casual opinion and i have many opinions. i like wearing black so maybe i'm just a hypocrite but at least there's a bit of variety in the gang. it's not like is that a girl or a boy? do they know how to smile? it's not my fault if you get offended because it's not like you share your thoughts homos .you just reading mine. SERIOUSLY scram! why do i even do this shit on the internet!
in contrast, so far this day has been perfect
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
notice of importance
yes everyone, i DO have credit!!!!
flinging a text, the first sentence has been "is this rach?" or "wait, you have credit?"
I HAVE CREDIT ON MY CELLULAR yah it is rach!!!
flinging a text, the first sentence has been "is this rach?" or "wait, you have credit?"
I HAVE CREDIT ON MY CELLULAR yah it is rach!!!
Me
Jobe reckons that i'm Jane off Daria!
he told me initially that i was daria but then he said i was actually more laidback than daria and that i was her best friend, Jane :
hmmmm ok!
i guess i can kinda see it
he told me initially that i was daria but then he said i was actually more laidback than daria and that i was her best friend, Jane :
hmmmm ok!
i guess i can kinda see it
Monday, September 24, 2007
Aha Shake Heartbreak
Huffman don't take no nonsense
He's here to rectify
He's got his black belt buckle,
And the red man's fire in his eye
You with your switchblade posse,
I'll get my guns from the south,
We'll take to the yard like a cock fight
Four kicks who's strutting now?
This party is overrated,
But there aint shit else to do
She's a lovin' on a boy from the city,
I'll be lovin' him under my shoe
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
lately i've been listening to/ in the mood for music that you would play when you're smashing shit! it really fits how i feel at the moment, not to be mistaken for an angry mood where you're smashing your enemy's china shelf with rage but rather a really, really enthusiastic happiness because everything is so so gr8888 where you just want to smash even your own stuff, take a baseball bat and just drag it along your walls whilst jumping on your bed with a huge grin and hair over your face to the music that encourages this mood! because you have all this bounce built up and you just want to leave a little (or big) path of destruction to show for it. yeah boi totally!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but i don't want to smash my room it's nice and my cat's in there
FOUR KICKS
He's here to rectify
He's got his black belt buckle,
And the red man's fire in his eye
You with your switchblade posse,
I'll get my guns from the south,
We'll take to the yard like a cock fight
Four kicks who's strutting now?
This party is overrated,
But there aint shit else to do
She's a lovin' on a boy from the city,
I'll be lovin' him under my shoe
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
lately i've been listening to/ in the mood for music that you would play when you're smashing shit! it really fits how i feel at the moment, not to be mistaken for an angry mood where you're smashing your enemy's china shelf with rage but rather a really, really enthusiastic happiness because everything is so so gr8888 where you just want to smash even your own stuff, take a baseball bat and just drag it along your walls whilst jumping on your bed with a huge grin and hair over your face to the music that encourages this mood! because you have all this bounce built up and you just want to leave a little (or big) path of destruction to show for it. yeah boi totally!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but i don't want to smash my room it's nice and my cat's in there
FOUR KICKS
Sunday, September 23, 2007
rant pt. II
i really hate those girls that apply like, 12 applications of fake tan in one go, plus bronzing lotion on the day. you know, the kind you see in big female groups at festivals, all wearing the same high-waisted denim shorts, singlet, headband and wayfarers. oh, and plimsoles. but the main dislike of mine is your fucking streaky legs. it's not even raining but your tan has bled all over the place, running in rivers down your legs, collecting at your ankles and staining your white plimsoles. and don't even get me started on your fucked up (bronzed) faces !!
it's like, what the fuck is wrong with you? do you think that shit looks good? looks hot? na!
it's like, what the fuck is wrong with you? do you think that shit looks good? looks hot? na!
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